random inspiration from therapy

Sometimes change is hard. As a person changes in therapy, they become a better self. Some people feel really bad about who they were before therapy. For instance, many people become more caring for others and regret having lived so selfishly in the past. I think these people had to be selfish in the past because caring was too dangerous. When people have experienced significant interpersonal hurt, connecting with others just leads to more hurt. One’s self-protective instinct says, “Don’t you dare open up again!” Yet, as one grows in love, self-acceptance and healing, it’s hard to keep disconnected from others. Therapy heals the heart and when the heart opens it necessarily begins to connect with others. That’s its function: to remember and extend our interconnectedness. So, if this interconnected caring feels too unfamiliar, strange and frightening, remember what you really value and care about, which for most people includes love and being loved.

If anxiety and fear drives you, your only chance of thinking clearly is to remember what you value most. ...a soldier’s courage carried by love for fellow soldier, a patient’s perseverance for the sake of self waiting to be born.